[How dare they. There's a surge of white-hot anger that stabs through her, her eyes brightening with the force of her rage. She should go down to the Council and tear them apart for making Scott feel like this, rend each and every one of them limb from limb until-
No. Focus. Revenge later. Scott now. With more than a little difficulty, she pushes the foreign, violent thought back down and takes a deep breath.]
So now they're just giving out other people's crimes? I'll-
[Do something, she doesn't know. But Scott hasn't done this, she knows he can't have.]
[For once, Scott doesn't seem to be as aware of Kotone's own feelings, at least he doesn't catch the rage that's shining in her eyes. Mostly because he's still staring at his lap, but also because various thoughts and conflicting feelings continue to churn inside him. He... he doesn't want to hurt anyone, let alone kill anyone, and normally, it would be easy to just toss aside whatever nonsense the Council saddles them with.
But...
It is true. At least in some universe. And it might happen to him still. Kotone and Minato seem to share extremely similar events, at least the important ones, so it might be the same thing for him. How is he supposed to feel that? Accept it?]
It's true. [His voice comes out so quietly, so unlike himself, hands shaking on top of his lap.]
I mean, I haven't killed Professor Xavier... but Quentin mentioned that it does happen in his universe. T-that I end up killing him in the future. [And Quentin is a lot of things, but he wouldn't lie about something like that. In fact, he was trying to be supportive in his own way. It didn't fully help, because everything still sucks.
His voice cracks as he speaks.] I-I don't want to do it, Kotone.
[Well, maybe this Xavier guy deserved it, she doesn't say, because that's not what Scott needs to hear right now. If it's like the desert, where Scott was trying to defend himself, of course he'd fight back. He'd have to.
But Scott's voice cracks, and Kotone pushes herself out of her seat to wrap her arms tightly around him, pulling his head against her chest and digging her chin into his hair.]
You're not Quentin's Scott, though. [Where his voice shakes and cracks, Kotone's is firm, still carrying that undercurrent of an anger too virulent to be her own. Fate, huh...? Just because she herself had been bound to one, she'd still had a choice, in the end. Hopefully Scott will, too, even if it doesn't seem like much of one.] You can make your own choices. You're strong enough to do that.
[He isn't Quentin's Scott in a lot of ways, even from the little that he's heard about him. He's an amazing leader, a bunch of mutants respect him (even Quentin did), and yet... he still did something completely awful. If someone like that still made that choice to kill Xavier, how can he say he'll be much different? Especially if some cosmic space fire bird possesses him?
Maybe it isn't even a choice, but just something that happens. It's not a comfort. He doesn't want that.
Nonetheless, Scott keeps his face buried against her chest, eyes shut tight behind his shades in case they get bumped up. Last thing he wants right now is to accidentally blast his girlfriend in half, but he certainly doesn't want to pull away. In fact, his hands reaches up to wrap around her waist, seeking her comfort and strength right now. He may also be just a little emotional because of what happened with Dara's organs still... just that fear of losing her. He wants Kotone to be with him forever, even though it's not possible.
He allows himself the thought for now, because it's the only thing that keeps him even somewhat together right now. Kotone making feel like things might be okay, that he's still himself, although his mind can't help but wander back to the parchment.]
...But you and Minato share similar events, I know you two do. [He's not sure how he isn't crying right now, maybe it's that fear and anxiety that's pushing ahead. Emotions that he can't hide, especially as his grip tightens around her.]
Maybe I am a murderer, Kotone-- I have already killed people here. Maybe it'll just happen, that Phoenix will come down and possess me.
[She almost wants to lash out at Quentin for even telling Scott all of this. Distantly, there's a part of her that knows that all this anger has to belong to Dara, that it can't really all be hers, but it feels kind of good to be this angry about something. Even if there's realistically nothing she can do about it.
She squeezes Scott all the tighter and takes a deep breath, letting her fingers curl against him as if she could somehow protect him from his own guilt.]
When I lost control of Thanatos 'cause of that cult and almost killed you... you didn't hate me for it. [Kind of the opposite, considering how they are now. She presses her lips tightly together for a moment and exhales another breath before continuing,] If somebody -- Phoenix -- possesses you, that doesn't mean it's you, Scott. You know that, right?
[This is the first she's heard of "Phoenix" but trying to dig for details about that really isn't all that important, she's pretty sure. Scott's feelings are the most important thing.
Also she could use what had just happened a few hours ago with Dara's stomach as an example, but she doesn't exactly want to open that back up again.]
[If there's anything that can get Scott to reply almost immediately and with full conviction, it's reassuring Kotone. He doesn't pull away from his place against her chest, only shaking his head as he swallows.]
I could never hate you. [It's the first time he sounds so sure of himself, because that belief will hold true no matter what happens. He loves her, so much, even if he sometimes gets frustrated or upset. And... and he knows that Kotone wouldn't hate him if he hurt her through some cult thing, even if he may not fully forgive himself. Hell, he almost hurt her back when he lost control due to the corruption and she's still with him right now.
...
Still, that bravado really doesn't last for long, not as he truly considers the rest of her words. If he's not fully himself when that happens, can he fully be blamed? Maybe not, but is that good enough?
He's still not sure how all that Phoenix stuff works or if 'possession' is even the right word. Quentin just mentioned that the creature cozies up to him and... guess a lot of bad things happen from there. He didn't get all the details because he was afraid at that time, but now it's too late to ask the mutant for more information. Maybe a hint how to possibly stop something like that, but maybe it can't be stopped anyway.]
It... it won't change the fact that he dies. And that I still did it. [...] K-Kotone, he's a good person, I-I only knew him for a couple of days but... but he was so nice. He opened his own house to mutants with no place to go. How can any of this be okay?? W-wouldn't you still feel guilty, even if it was out of your control?
You don't know that, [she continues, a little stubbornly as she hugs him all the closer.] Just because "a" Scott did that doesn't mean it was you. It hasn't happened yet.
[Just because she and Minato are so similar, there are a lot of things that are different, too. They're their own people, with their own actions and relationships. Even if there's another Scott Summers out there -- or multiples of them -- that doesn't mean they're all the same.
But she knows that kind of reassurance isn't going to be enough. A quiet sigh, and she adds softly,] Yeah. I still felt really guilty after I'd hurt you, so...
I don't care what the Council says, though. You're still you. And you shouldn't be given a crime you haven't committed. I'll support you no matter what.
[But it could happen, because fate. Like how certain things seemed to have still happened in Minato's and Kotone's worlds. However, Scott doesn't voice those thoughts again, because neither of them really know for sure. It's nice to think that he's just overreacting, that the crime on his parchment is just there to upset him. He hates letting them win, but being told that he may kill the Professor is a hard pill to swallow still.
At least it's nice just letting himself be held by her.]
I hate how I'd almost hurt you. [He says quietly, not feeling too much better, but it's nice to have that firm conviction from Kotone. That she'll always support him, even if he does something unforgivable. He's not sure if she should, but the thought of her turning away gets his eyes to squeeze shut. He really doesn't want that either.] ...Would you still love me even if I turn out bad?
[He shouldn't sound so afraid, not when he knows her answer, but.]
Of course. [No hesitation or consideration needed, though again, his words make her blood boil with an uncharacteristic rage. How dare the Council make him feel like this? And he'd been dwelling on it for how long? She wishes he'd told her sooner, but-- again, another deep breath, and she presses a kiss to the top of his hair. Inhaling his scent helps a little with pushing back that rage, reminds her who she is and why she's here.]
But you won't, [she adds finally, shifting her grip to gently take his chin and try to prompt him to look up at her, see the equal parts steel and affection in her face as she smiles at him.]
[Yes, he knew what her answer was going to be, but it doesn't stop Scott from letting out a half choked noise, slightly cut off as tears well up behind his glasses. Just hearing Kotone actually say that, that she'll love him no matter what, truly means a lot. Because even if... if he changes, if he's not the same teen that she shared sandwiches with on the rooftop, she'll still love him.
It makes facing the future just a little less frightening. However he turns out to be... she'll still be with him. At least in this world. It's scary to think what may happen back in his own world, but he'll just have to think about that some point later and not when he's gripping her so tightly.
When she tilts his chin up, Kotone will see a couple streaks of tears falling from beneath his glasses. Y-yeah, guess he is feeling emotional, the events of the day just really compounding on him that he can't stop himself. At least he knows it's okay if he cries in front of her.]
Promise...? [A part of him feels bad asking for that extra confirmation, but he just wants to hear her say it one more time.]
[Again, not a hint of doubt or hesitation in her voice. It's an easy promise to make, considering that she knows there's no way Scott will turn out "bad." And even if he did, he'd still listen to her, and she could help him. No matter what, she'd help him get past whatever it is.
She presses a gentle kiss to his lips, and if her mouth still tastes faintly of iron, maybe that's all in her head. Gazing down at him, her lip quirks into a little, humorless smile.]
[Is it silly to cling to promises? Maybe, but coming from Kotone... he knows she really means it. She's the only person that really makes him feel safe. As such, he doesn't seem to notice or care if her mouth tastes just slightly of iron, prolonging their kiss just for a little longer. He'd never pull away from her.
Although, she's reassuring him once more, huh? And he didn't even ask. Scott smiles just slightly, something a little less stressed in his expression before he buries his face against her chest. Things aren't fully resolved, maybe they can't be, but he's okay. Right now, he really is.
...
Wasn't he supposed to ask about her demons in return? He will, just a little later, just wanting to let the moment last and he figures that Kotone will be okay with that. It doesn't seem like he'll lose her anytime soon and that's what is important.]
No matter what happens, I'll be here for you too. [Okay, just one reassurance to her.]
[It's a simple statement, but a true one. No matter what, she knows Scott will be there for her, for better or for worse. The situation doesn't matter; even if she made a terrible mistake, even if somehow she became the "bad" one... Scott would be there for her in spite of it all. That's maybe not a good thing, but with a deep breath, she just holds him closer and keeps her chin pressed against the top of his head.
It's going to hurt him so, so much when she's finally gone, but at least for the time she's here, she can support him unconditionally.]
Thank you for telling me. [Because he didn't have to tell her about the change to his parchment. She hasn't even looked at hers in a long time, because it didn't matter to her what the Council charged her with. But it clearly matters to Scott, which means that his parchment is important to her. Kissing the top of his head one more time, she adds,] And... thanks for being here with me.
[It really makes him feel better to hear that confirmation from Kotone. Knowing that despite everything, she can still go to him and that he'll always be there for her. He... he doesn't want to be weak or make her feel like she can't talk to him about stuff, because he knows how alone she can really feel. Despite all the friends she has and the bright smile she shows the world, Scott knows that she sometimes forces herself to be that way.
He sniffs lightly against her, eyes closing shut for just a moment as he lets himself rest and enjoy this moment for a bit longer. It's a good thing Ange isn't around to see all this, huh?]
Kotone draws back, but just enough that she can press a kiss to his forehead, gently cupping his cheeks with the motion. As long as she's able, she'll be here for him. Even after she's not here anymore, hopefully he'll be able to take the time they spent together as some comfort. Maybe in the future, he'll love someone else once she's gone, but if she can at least stay a little present in his heart, maybe that's enough.]
Me too, Scott. Don't ever doubt that, okay?
[Even if she sucks at expressing it sometimes, she really, truly loves him, maybe more than he even knows.]
[Raising his hands to hers, so that she can keep them against his cheeks, Scott nods with an almost watery smile. He knows this isn't forever, but he doesn't need those thoughts right now, shoving them away so that he can look at her with complete trust and affection, despite the tears staining his cheeks and his glasses covering his eyes.]
no subject
No. Focus. Revenge later. Scott now. With more than a little difficulty, she pushes the foreign, violent thought back down and takes a deep breath.]
So now they're just giving out other people's crimes? I'll-
[Do something, she doesn't know. But Scott hasn't done this, she knows he can't have.]
no subject
But...
It is true. At least in some universe. And it might happen to him still. Kotone and Minato seem to share extremely similar events, at least the important ones, so it might be the same thing for him. How is he supposed to feel that? Accept it?]
It's true. [His voice comes out so quietly, so unlike himself, hands shaking on top of his lap.]
I mean, I haven't killed Professor Xavier... but Quentin mentioned that it does happen in his universe. T-that I end up killing him in the future. [And Quentin is a lot of things, but he wouldn't lie about something like that. In fact, he was trying to be supportive in his own way. It didn't fully help, because everything still sucks.
His voice cracks as he speaks.] I-I don't want to do it, Kotone.
no subject
But Scott's voice cracks, and Kotone pushes herself out of her seat to wrap her arms tightly around him, pulling his head against her chest and digging her chin into his hair.]
You're not Quentin's Scott, though. [Where his voice shakes and cracks, Kotone's is firm, still carrying that undercurrent of an anger too virulent to be her own. Fate, huh...? Just because she herself had been bound to one, she'd still had a choice, in the end. Hopefully Scott will, too, even if it doesn't seem like much of one.] You can make your own choices. You're strong enough to do that.
no subject
Maybe it isn't even a choice, but just something that happens. It's not a comfort. He doesn't want that.
Nonetheless, Scott keeps his face buried against her chest, eyes shut tight behind his shades in case they get bumped up. Last thing he wants right now is to accidentally blast his girlfriend in half, but he certainly doesn't want to pull away. In fact, his hands reaches up to wrap around her waist, seeking her comfort and strength right now. He may also be just a little emotional because of what happened with Dara's organs still... just that fear of losing her. He wants Kotone to be with him forever, even though it's not possible.
He allows himself the thought for now, because it's the only thing that keeps him even somewhat together right now. Kotone making feel like things might be okay, that he's still himself, although his mind can't help but wander back to the parchment.]
...But you and Minato share similar events, I know you two do. [He's not sure how he isn't crying right now, maybe it's that fear and anxiety that's pushing ahead. Emotions that he can't hide, especially as his grip tightens around her.]
Maybe I am a murderer, Kotone-- I have already killed people here. Maybe it'll just happen, that Phoenix will come down and possess me.
no subject
She squeezes Scott all the tighter and takes a deep breath, letting her fingers curl against him as if she could somehow protect him from his own guilt.]
When I lost control of Thanatos 'cause of that cult and almost killed you... you didn't hate me for it. [Kind of the opposite, considering how they are now. She presses her lips tightly together for a moment and exhales another breath before continuing,] If somebody -- Phoenix -- possesses you, that doesn't mean it's you, Scott. You know that, right?
[This is the first she's heard of "Phoenix" but trying to dig for details about that really isn't all that important, she's pretty sure. Scott's feelings are the most important thing.
Also she could use what had just happened a few hours ago with Dara's stomach as an example, but she doesn't exactly want to open that back up again.]
no subject
I could never hate you. [It's the first time he sounds so sure of himself, because that belief will hold true no matter what happens. He loves her, so much, even if he sometimes gets frustrated or upset. And... and he knows that Kotone wouldn't hate him if he hurt her through some cult thing, even if he may not fully forgive himself. Hell, he almost hurt her back when he lost control due to the corruption and she's still with him right now.
...
Still, that bravado really doesn't last for long, not as he truly considers the rest of her words. If he's not fully himself when that happens, can he fully be blamed? Maybe not, but is that good enough?
He's still not sure how all that Phoenix stuff works or if 'possession' is even the right word. Quentin just mentioned that the creature cozies up to him and... guess a lot of bad things happen from there. He didn't get all the details because he was afraid at that time, but now it's too late to ask the mutant for more information. Maybe a hint how to possibly stop something like that, but maybe it can't be stopped anyway.]
It... it won't change the fact that he dies. And that I still did it. [...] K-Kotone, he's a good person, I-I only knew him for a couple of days but... but he was so nice. He opened his own house to mutants with no place to go. How can any of this be okay?? W-wouldn't you still feel guilty, even if it was out of your control?
no subject
[Just because she and Minato are so similar, there are a lot of things that are different, too. They're their own people, with their own actions and relationships. Even if there's another Scott Summers out there -- or multiples of them -- that doesn't mean they're all the same.
But she knows that kind of reassurance isn't going to be enough. A quiet sigh, and she adds softly,] Yeah. I still felt really guilty after I'd hurt you, so...
I don't care what the Council says, though. You're still you. And you shouldn't be given a crime you haven't committed. I'll support you no matter what.
no subject
At least it's nice just letting himself be held by her.]
I hate how I'd almost hurt you. [He says quietly, not feeling too much better, but it's nice to have that firm conviction from Kotone. That she'll always support him, even if he does something unforgivable. He's not sure if she should, but the thought of her turning away gets his eyes to squeeze shut. He really doesn't want that either.] ...Would you still love me even if I turn out bad?
[He shouldn't sound so afraid, not when he knows her answer, but.]
no subject
But you won't, [she adds finally, shifting her grip to gently take his chin and try to prompt him to look up at her, see the equal parts steel and affection in her face as she smiles at him.]
no subject
It makes facing the future just a little less frightening. However he turns out to be... she'll still be with him. At least in this world. It's scary to think what may happen back in his own world, but he'll just have to think about that some point later and not when he's gripping her so tightly.
When she tilts his chin up, Kotone will see a couple streaks of tears falling from beneath his glasses. Y-yeah, guess he is feeling emotional, the events of the day just really compounding on him that he can't stop himself. At least he knows it's okay if he cries in front of her.]
Promise...? [A part of him feels bad asking for that extra confirmation, but he just wants to hear her say it one more time.]
no subject
[Again, not a hint of doubt or hesitation in her voice. It's an easy promise to make, considering that she knows there's no way Scott will turn out "bad." And even if he did, he'd still listen to her, and she could help him. No matter what, she'd help him get past whatever it is.
She presses a gentle kiss to his lips, and if her mouth still tastes faintly of iron, maybe that's all in her head. Gazing down at him, her lip quirks into a little, humorless smile.]
I'm with you no matter what happens, good or bad.
no subject
Although, she's reassuring him once more, huh? And he didn't even ask. Scott smiles just slightly, something a little less stressed in his expression before he buries his face against her chest. Things aren't fully resolved, maybe they can't be, but he's okay. Right now, he really is.
...
Wasn't he supposed to ask about her demons in return? He will, just a little later, just wanting to let the moment last and he figures that Kotone will be okay with that. It doesn't seem like he'll lose her anytime soon and that's what is important.]
No matter what happens, I'll be here for you too. [Okay, just one reassurance to her.]
no subject
[It's a simple statement, but a true one. No matter what, she knows Scott will be there for her, for better or for worse. The situation doesn't matter; even if she made a terrible mistake, even if somehow she became the "bad" one... Scott would be there for her in spite of it all. That's maybe not a good thing, but with a deep breath, she just holds him closer and keeps her chin pressed against the top of his head.
It's going to hurt him so, so much when she's finally gone, but at least for the time she's here, she can support him unconditionally.]
Thank you for telling me. [Because he didn't have to tell her about the change to his parchment. She hasn't even looked at hers in a long time, because it didn't matter to her what the Council charged her with. But it clearly matters to Scott, which means that his parchment is important to her. Kissing the top of his head one more time, she adds,] And... thanks for being here with me.
no subject
He sniffs lightly against her, eyes closing shut for just a moment as he lets himself rest and enjoy this moment for a bit longer. It's a good thing Ange isn't around to see all this, huh?]
...I'll always love you, Kotone.
no subject
Kotone draws back, but just enough that she can press a kiss to his forehead, gently cupping his cheeks with the motion. As long as she's able, she'll be here for him. Even after she's not here anymore, hopefully he'll be able to take the time they spent together as some comfort. Maybe in the future, he'll love someone else once she's gone, but if she can at least stay a little present in his heart, maybe that's enough.]
Me too, Scott. Don't ever doubt that, okay?
[Even if she sucks at expressing it sometimes, she really, truly loves him, maybe more than he even knows.]
no subject
I won't.