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[orphne]

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[orphne]

I don't really think I get it...

But are you happy, Dazai-san?

[nullificates]

you'll get it when you're older, or have been in love a couple of different times!

... i'm scared!!! fufufufufu!!!!!!!!!

[orphne]

Oh. I don't think I've felt that, then.

But being scared is good, probably? I think it means you care.

Do Chuuya and Fyodor-san know that you're, you know. Involved with both of them?

[nullificates]

i'll be easier to explain when you do, you see!

oh. i came home, told chuuya i had slept at fyodor's, and he just said "THANK FUCK" so i'm gonna go on a limb here and say he doesn't care.

[orphne]

Mmm, I don't think it'll happen for me. I'm kind of on a time limit!

[Don't forget!]

Does Fyodor-san also not care??

[nullificates]

and you think you get to choose these things why exactly?

ah. i think he probably would care more, since he's extremely religious, but then again, we're not in the business of trying to change each other, so it's fine.

[orphne]

This isn't about me right now, Dazai-san!

Anyway, you said he "would" care more, so does that mean he doesn't know...

Are you cheating on your new boyfriend, Dazai-san?

[nullificates]

that definitely does not mean he doesn't know. he has pestered chuuya about it even before we did anything about it, aside from some things from home, so trust me, he knows!

i would never cheat on fy! i like my ideals of a painless death.

[orphne]

I super don't get it then.

Are you happy AND scared, at least?

[Asking again because it is so so important.]

[nullificates]

(what a strange little concept she keeps throwing around.)

i'm as happy as i can be.

[orphne]

That's good then.

I'm really happy for you, Dazai-san. I knew stuff would work out! Right?

[nullificates]

let's see, don't celebrate just yet.

[orphne]

Nuh-uh, I'm gonna be happy for right now 'cause I know you're terrified.

So SOMEBODY has to be happy about it, and I guess it's me!

[nullificates]

ah, to live in a container surrounded by toxic chemicals... where no one can attack me like this!!!!!!

[orphne]

You're the one who told me, you know!! Exposing weaknesses!!

I mean it, though. It's weird, but as long as it works for the three of you, I'm happy.

[nullificates]

or am i just bragging about my great relationship skills

yes, a russian terrorist, a reformed mafioso, and a slug is weird, i'd think so too.

[orphne]

It's not nice to call yourself a slug...

[She knows he means Chuuya.]

[nullificates]

please

[orphne]

Slugzai

[nullificates]

im leaving you

[orphne]

Oslugu Dazai?

[nullificates]

the dazai osamu youre trying to reach is currently unavailable leave your message after the beep

[orphne]

BEEEEEEP

Namekuji-san~ I have a bunch of lettuce and other nice slug-treats for you~

[nullificates]

the dazai osamu you're trying to reach has delegated mentorship permanently to chuuya snailhara, please press one for your anger management classes, two to break your volume control, three to shrink to 140cm.

[orphne]

Wooooow I thought your boyfriend was supposed to be my new mentor? If I keep getting traded like this, my feelings will get hurt